Turkey Medicine

Hello friends. It is the wee hours of the morning and Thanksgiving, I decided to share a funny story though at the time it wasn’t very funny.

I was visiting Niagara -on- the -Lake a few Septembers ago One of my favorite go to spots and I decided to stay an extra day . Normally I like to rent t a bike cause the weather was a perfect warm Fall day but no avail so I thought Id take a stroll along the Gorge . Now just so ya know, when I first arrived I was warned by a friend where I was staying that there was a wild turkey on the loose and people were waving their umbrellas at the old Buzzard.

Anyway, I was having such a glorious walk in the woods and normally

I take a different route but this time I lost track of time and I somehow ended up on the usual busy Parkway.

Suddenly I heard the sounds of GOBBLE, GOBBLE ,GOBBLE !!!!

I turned around and to my surprise and fright I saw that old Turkey heading right for me. He actually took flight to get to me sooner.

Yikes I thought he is coming right up to my face. I also couldn’t believe how surreal this was cause there were no cars in sight.

This Turkey did some kind of ritual he was staring right in my eyes but his head was turned so I only saw his profile. I kept saying I love you …I love you( I thought, I love to eat you NO!!) then I thought maybe I should take my hat off and shades but then I thought he might peck my eyes out so I put both my hat and shades back on.

Suddenly the Turkey turned and went behind me and jumped on my back I was terrified I still kept thinking where’s all the cars I was praying someone would come and rescue me otherwise I was going to be left for dead and then all the vultures would eat the rest of what the turkey doesn’t finish.

Out of nowhere finally a car pulled up quite a ways down on the pavement a man got out of his car reluctantly and hid behind his door and yelled ‘ARE YOU OK??’

Ok , I thought …yeah I’m just great I always walk around with a turkey on my back!! NO !!!! I yelled, I’M NOT OK !!!!

The man came over and he tried to pry that Buzzard off. He succeeded then the turkey jumped on my back again .At some point I must of ran for my life cause I have no recollection of how I arrived back at the hotel

There was no Turkey on my back I wondered if the Turkey attacked the man who rescued me. All I kept thinking was I was grateful to be alive in one piece.

When I arrived home, I went to the doctor and the doctor was trying not to laugh he said he had to look twice at the form where it said attacked by wild Turkey.

Apparently they do not carry rabies , I thought this one was just angry.

Some of my friends ( so called Turkey expert’s) were convinced the Turkey was trying to make love to me and that this was a mating ritual ,whatever.

Meanwhile it turns out they usually are not allowed to kill a Wild Turkey only remove it to another area so that the Turkey can attack another area ?

I got a email from the hotel telling me that the turkey had to be put down cause it attacked a woman on her bike threw her off and jumped into a man’s eyes also it terrorized a school bus and children were chased off the bus by the turkey maybe this was Freddy from that horror film possessed .

After I was working at one of the trade shows and on my break I was sitting in the restaurant and a woman got on the speaker to announce a well known chef and she says “today we are going to learn all kinds of Turkey recipes”. I then got up and ran back to my booth .

A close friend of mine once told me she had been attacked by a wild Turkey and she says we both have Turkey medicine now. Somehow I feel if anything I am cured of Turkey dinner, turkey sandwiches , turkey ala king. I’m done with Turkey’s.

You may be thinking what am I having for Thanksgiving dinner ?

PASTA yum!!

Happy Thanksgiving Friends

Sandra